The Egg Came First

Hatched yesterday [GFDL]

Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Everyone has their own theory, and no one agrees which is right. Anyway, I bring forward my most correct theory and plausible solution to the chicken-and-egg quandary.

If the first chicken were to mate with a proto-chicken, their offspring would consist of chickens, proto-chickens and hybrids, according to Mendelian genetics

The theory begins with the parents very first chicken. The parents of the first chicken, were by definition, not chickens (otherwise, their offspring wouldn't have been first anymore). These proto-chickens were evolutionary precursors to the first chicken and may have tasted much like chicken. By some combination or mutation, a proto-chicken couple laid the egg of what would be the first chicken. So see! The chicken egg came first, because its parents were not chickens!


Let us further explore the life of the first chicken. Who was his mate? The first chicken may have mated with a proto-chicken to sire a brood of chickens and proto-chickens. Or suppose the first chicken's parents laid several more eggs. Similar combinations or mutations among his siblings or cousins may have produced a second chicken, with whom he would have founded the Chicken dynasty.

And they were prosperous. And they lived long joyfully. Until the discovery of frying.

Are tomatoes evil?

Red tomato, public domain.

I hated tomatoes. As a child, I had rejected all vegetables, regarding them distasteful, to be eaten only as punishment. My first act of betrayal was when I was 10 years old: at a party, I had a careful helping of some strange spaghetti, not with the usual cheese and meat sauce, but in a light sauce of olive oil, garlic and spices with tomatoes curiously fried whole. The spaghetti lacking meat, I begrudged the host for his inconsideration towards young carnivores. Though I was hungry, I avoided the tomatoes, until halfway though my plate I accidentally bit into one, thereby making the startling discovery that evening: fried tomatoes are scrumptious!

Since then I have relished the slices of tomato in my salads and hamburgers, and I have enjoyed tomatoes fresh, fried, or as catsup. I have even made it mandatory that my grilled porkchops be served with sliced tomatoes, to my gastronomical delight.

Deadly nightshade berries. Photo under the GFDL License.

Understandably, there has been a pervasive belief that tomatoes are evil. The plant belongs to same family as of the deadly nightshade, known to be one of the most poisonous herbs. Introduced by Spain in the 1500's from the New World, people were suspicious of the tomato, considering it poisonous, and even regarding it as the forbidden fruit from the Garden of Eden. It was only in the 18th or 19th century that tomatoes became popular in households. Its sinister reputation remains till present, with an entire website tomatoesareevil.com out to warn the world about the deceiving fruit (or is it a vegetable?).

Cranach, "The Fall of Man" 16th century.

It is easy to understand how some people think that something so good could be irredeemably evil (although I would prefer to speculate that the author of tomatoesareevil.com had been traumatized by The Attack of the Killer Tomatoes at a tender age). Fruit or vegetable, the tomato will always be welcome to my digestive tract.

1. Aside from deadly nightshade, other poisonous plants may be of interest to the reader.
2. The Italian word for tomato, pomodoro, sounds like the French pomme d'or, or "apple of gold": a possible allusion to the forbidden fruit of Eden [it may have come from pomme d'amour, "apple of love"].
3. The scientific genus of tomato, Lycopersicon, sounds a bit like the family Lycosidae, wolf spiders.
4. Being 10 years old, I had no idea that the "spaghetti" was actually angel hair pasta.

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